Monday, July 20, 2015

Yeah, It Still Hurts

Dusting off the cobwebs...

Most of the time, I try not to feel sorry for myself. For one, it doesn't change my situation, and two I end up feeling worse. It's harder not to follow my own advice in July. My youngest son will be thirteen years old this week. Cognitively, he's about 4 or 5. He has a closet full of preschool toys, musical toys, toy cars with sound. One can  only buy so many preschool toys before it gets old - really old. He already has most of the popular ones.

Tonight I was in Toys R Us in near tears wondering what to buy for him. It's not like I waited until the last minute; I have been racking my brain since Christmas over what to buy for him. And to think that I have to turn around and do this in 5 months for Christmas nearly sends me over the edge. How hard could it be? Plenty hard.

Currently, he likes his giant teddy bear and CDs. It's funny watching him listen to one of my Eagles CDs, but he still likes the nursery rhyme CDs, too. He has alot of CDs. There's always candy as he likes Hershey bars. There is also a cute sheepskin cover papasan chair that was at Target. He likes scooters - the kind where you can sit and scoot. Unfortunately, almost all of those kinds of scooters are for the 3-5 year old crowd. He's too big, but not too old, for those.

This really shouldn't be a big deal, but it is. I always feel as though I'm short changing him. When I think of the cool birthday gifts (hamster) and Christmas gifts (too many to list) that my older son has gotten...I can't go there.

This time of the year also makes me realize that I wish he were a typical 13 year old boy doing typical thirteen year old things: biking, skateboarding, swimming, playing, running, talking, checking his phone. He does laugh, though. Oh boy does he laugh. His laugh is a hearty, exuberant laugh that is infectious.

So, the pity party is over because I have a real party to plan. I will find something. It may not be extravagant or typical teen gear, but it will be something he enjoys.

Rejoice in the Lord, always. I will say it again: Rejoice! -Philippians 4:4

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