Stepping Up and Stepping Out

Many, many years ago when I was a senior in high school, I got a part in the school's spring production of You Can't Take it With You. I'll let you follow the link to Wikipedia for the synopsis. (I played Penelope, BTW.) Ever since then, the phrase "you can't take it with you" has stuck with me although it's taken a while to let it soak in. When it's time for me to leave this earth and enter into eternity, I won't be able to take anything with me. This means that my time, talent, and treasure are all temporary things and it does me no good whatsoever to hoard them. So, why not share them? I'm glad you asked.

I'm a Star Trek fan because I love the fact that in the Star Trek universe, the people of Earth have finally united and have worked together to eliminate poverty and disease. I know, it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling, too. Although I love the idea of eliminating poverty, I realize that I've never done anything to work toward that objective because it seemed so daunting...until now.

Last year, my husband and I decided to step up and step out in faith and sponsor two children through Compassion International: a little girl in Kenya and a little girl in Bolivia. A month after sponsoring these two girls, we decided to sponsor one more: a girl in Indonesia. I've always been skeptical about child sponsorship programs, but last year Wess Stafford, the president of Compassion International, spoke at our church. It was a moving speech. I had checked out Compassion before and they are highly rated at Charity Navigator. That's important to me. I realized that I could go on being skeptical - doing nothing to alleviate poverty - or, I could step out in faith to make a difference, if only in the life of one person. Eight months later, I haven't regretted it. I write to the girls in Kenya and Indonesia since I signed up to sponsor them; my husband writes to the girl in Bolivia since he sponsored her. It has been an eye-opening and joyful experience. The photo above is of some artwork that my little girl in Indonesia was able to send to me.

I encourage you to find your own way of sharing your time, talent, and treasure. Perhaps, like me, you are intrigued but skeptical of sponsoring a child. I totally understand. Head on over to Charity Navigator and do some research. I firmly believe that when we give of ourselves and share with others, we receive so much more in return. Remember: you can't take it with you.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." ~Matthew 6:19-21

Technically I'm Not a Mrs.

My husband and I have been married for 21 ½ years. We'll be celebrating our 22^nd anniversary this June. For various and sundry reasons that would have involved a paperwork nightmare, I did not change my name when we married. I also happened to like my name, so I was fine about not changing it. Since my husband is fairly easy-going, he didn't seem to mind one way or the other. My last name begins with R. My husband's last name begins with H. Sometimes I'm addressed as Mrs. H, usually by the neighborhood kids; sometimes Mrs. R, usually by people who know me but not my husband. And what about the children? They have my husband's last name. I still have mine. It's never been an issue.

Most of the time, I don't even think about the name difference. Occasionally, I'm reminded that I'm still in the minority of women who kept their names after marriage...like when I'm on Facebook and I'm looking at my friends' names. Besides me, only two of my friends who are married have kept their own names. Some of my friends are listed as Firstname Maidenname because they are divorced or they never married. Some friends are listed as Firstname Maidenname Marriedname. And some are listed as Firstname Marriedname.

The only time it ever truly bothered me to have my first name paired with my husband's last name was when our insurance company decided to change it for me. For reasons I can't remember, we decided to combine our auto insurance policies by adding him onto mine after we married. The following month our bill was addressed as Hisname and Myname Hislastname, complete with new insurance cards with my "new name". This was problematic for me because legally I was not CH; I was CR. My driver's license was still CR and my auto loan was still in my name. Furthermore, I had not asked them to change my name. They automatically did it for me.

When I called the office to make the correction, the agent's admin just couldn't understand why I didn't change my last name and she wasn't sure if the database could accommodate this request. (This was the pre-Internet stone age of 1991.) Oh hell no. Funny how people react when other people go against the grain and don't do what they think is right. So I wrote a flaming nastygram to the corporate office excoriating their company for imposing their patriarchal attitudes onto me, a paying customer, and reminding them that legally only I could change my name and if this wasn't fixed then the next letter would be from my lawyer....blah blah blah. Never mind that I didn't have a lawyer. ☺ Lo and behold, the next month it was fixed. Imagine that. We've had no problems since.

While I won't go so far as to say that I'm an easy-going person, I really don't care what other women (or men, for that matter) do with their names after they marry. Seriously. I.don't.care. Whatever floats your boat. It's the 21st century, so do what you want. The only judgmental opinion I have on the matter is this: if you think all women should change their names or that all women should keep their maiden names after marriage, then you have control issues and you need to lighten up or seek professional help. I realize that for some women it can be an emotional decision. For me it wasn't. In my opinion, changing your name like deciding to marry, should not be done lightly but rather with careful thought and consideration.

Merry Christmas!

Believe in the Love behind the reason for Christmas. May the love and peace of Christ be with you now and all through the year.
Merry Christmas!!

Believe

I have this ornament on my Christmas tree. It is simply the word "Believe" written in script and studded with rhinestones. At this time of year, we are exhorted to believe and we're bombarded with phrases like "Believe in the magic of Christmas" or "I believe in Santa Claus". I've even seen something like, "If you don't believe in Santa then you get underwear." Well, at least I still get underwear. 100% cotton, preferably, please.

However well-intentioned or humorous these phrases may be, I still think they're misguided. At best, they're a distraction from the true meaning of Christmas. At worst, they distort and deny the true meaning of Christmas. But what is the "true" meaning of Christmas? Quite simply, it is about the best gift ever given; the gift from God to us as so eloquently stated in the Gospel of John:

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." ~John 3:16-17

Believe and you will be saved. Believe that God loved you enough to do this for you and that no way no how could you ever work for it and earn it. That's why it's called a gift.

MeRrY ChRiStMaS!!

Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” “Yes, Lord,” she told him, “I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was to come into the world.” ~John 11:25-27